Abracadabra

 In the vernacular of magicians, “Abracadabra” means to ‘make something happen’. It derives from ancient mystics, alchemists and healers who used the word to summon the aid of benevolent spirits against misfortune and disease. It was an amulet or talisman symbolic of a cult—bad omen; good juju.

 Now it’s just a stage prop used in prestidigitation—a subtle verbal distraction; a form of misdirection.

 I am reminded of this magic word because, as a little kid, I was manic, hyperactive and capricious. I was predictably unpredictable and I drove my parents crazy. Perplexed but proud, they often vacillated between overt gratitude and abject fear; between enthusiasm and apprehension. 

 Held hostage by my insatiable curiosity to know the unknowable, they were physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted by an unrelenting barrage of questions which—intentional or not— tested all assumptions and challenged all rational thought.

 I was Dr. Spock’s worst nightmare. Not the Spock of Star Trek fame—son of Sarek, Ambassador of the universe—but Benjamin Spock the pediatrician and psychoanalyst who reimagined the role of parenting and up-ended the way in which children were raised, educated and nurtured.

The collision between these two extremes—the promise of a probing young mind, and the intense anxiety caused by such audacious prepubescent behavior—was no more evident than when my father took me to a magic show at the Loyal Order of Moose. It was an annual charity event supported by the Italian Sons and Daughters of America which, itself, was a cultural society to which my father not only belonged, but for which he once held office. 

 From the grand entrance to the grand finale, I was compelled to notice everything. “Hey dad, she didn’t really disappear, she ran behind the curtain.” “Hey dad, I learned that trick in Cub Scouts.” “Hey dad, that bird just peed on his head.”

 Armando il Magnifico never knew what hit him.

 But, even so, I needed more. I wanted to be mystified. To be dazzled and bewildered. To be astonished and amazed. To peek behind the curtain. To see the Wizard who was Oz. The human brain is wired for this; the human spirit craves it. Finding patterns and connections. Seeking answers. Solving problems.

 What I learned from this experience was both telling and important: first, never humiliate your father in public and; second, that magic is not an unexpected surprise, it is the fulfillment of an expectation—the magic is in you, not in the magician.  

 Abracadabra